"Granny Cute-Shirt"

I'm not really sure why I stopped doing this, I really enjoyed it!  I guess what I'm trying to say is IIII'MMMMM BBBBAAACCCKKKKK!!!!!

  I realize that you all will be so excited you cant stand it and you will probably be dropping everything that you do to read every post, but who am I kidding its not like I will be great at keeping up with it.  However after today's events I realized that a lot of weird things really do happen to me.

  Today for example, I walk into a doctors office and a lady of probably 70+ years old walks over to me and says "Awww honey cute shirt, guess we have good taste."  I thought it was somewhat funny right at the moment...then it hit me, this question will haunt me for the rest of my life...Is it ok that granny "cute-shirt" as we will call her was wearing the exact same shirt as me?  Which made me start thinking about my entire style life, everything I thought was, wasn't.  I have always kinda thought of myself as not having a lot of trendy style, but I always kinda thought I had somewhat of an idea of how to dress and what made me look ok, but now I am questioning it all...

  Now I realize that maybe this doesn't seem like a big deal to you, but it was the absolute worst day in the world to happen,  today was the day I had chosen to pick out my new years outfit.  Which still may not seem like a big deal until I went to a few stores,and realized that everything in every store was made to make me anyone wearing it look like a giant strobe light...when I caught myself cursing the designers for making these looks that would blind someone if you stood under a light at the correct angle, I was hit by a loud haunting voice saying "Somewhere in the world there a granny gripping about the same thing"  This voice kept getting louder and LOUDER until I had a complete melt down in the store, kicking and screaming, crying that snotty kind of cry, saying "NNNNOOOO, I will not be taken down by this" (ok, ok, so I'm slightly exaggerating, but there was a brief moment of panic).   So after trying on about 37 different things I finally picked out something to wear, and I'm still not sure that I wont be dressed just like my grandmother.

  This experience has thrown my whole psyche was thrown off.  My self esteem that was once mediocre at best was dropped to almost non-existent.  Now dont get me wrong there is nothing wrong with a cute granny dressed stylish, but if they are going to be a stylish granny I would much rather them be stylish in the same thing you're wearing...



  

  

Some days are better then others...

What makes a day bad?  I mean every day you wake up and every day you do the same thing that would not affect your day, workout, take a shower, frantically drink coffee, pour some cereal down my throat and run out of the door like the house is on fire.  Yes this is my normal routine for some reason being on time has never been a strong suit of mine, but eh, I'm learning to go with it ( it seems to bother others more then it does myself).  Then you get in your car start driving like a normal day and something goes tragically wrong, you can't pin point it, nor can you tell when it will strike but when it does you just know, its not gonna be a good day...

It could be that you have talked to 36 people that day and then you decided to take a bathroom break and when realize that the tiny part on your scalp that you forgot to put sunscreen on decided that it would peel leaving the entire top of your head a mass of very large skin particles that looks like you have the snow capped Rockie Mountains on your head...

It could be that are driving and get cut off by someone doing 30 miles under the speed limit and you start yelling and screaming like a mad person, only to realize that its was your grandma...

It could be that you think your husband threw something away that you really needed, and you really get mad, think very mean thoughts call him yell all the really mean thoughts at him, and then you find it, exactly where you put it up...

It could be that get in really big hurry and have a million things on your mind while carrying lunch into a building, talking on the phone and trying to balance on a pair of 4 inch heels you run smack into a sliding glass door while people are sitting in the waiting room...

It could be that while you are walking down a hallway and someone keeps asking questions and you just think she is a really friendly women, then right before you tell her about your lunch that she asked you about, you realize that she isn't talking to you at all, she is actually on the phone...

It could be that you are standing on an elevator with a food delivery guy when can totally smell the lunch he has brought and you aren't sure if he is carrying eggs or a large batch of broccoli (either way it smells like a giant fart) and you don't think twice about it because you see the lunch he has, until, he gets off the elevator leaving you to continue your journey in the fog machine and on the very next floor a large family gets on the elevator, who doesn't see the delivery guy and only smells the after effects of the "fart", and you can feel the subtle glances they give each other they are all thinking the same thing, "wow what did that girl eat"...

  It could be anything that can trigger a bad day, but the question is how do we get over it, that feeling, that irritability, that annoyance at anyone who even speaks.  You don't know?  Well neither do I, when you find out fill me in...

Until you figure it out I'm gonna use what God gave me and that my people is a good sense of humor!
Genesis 21:6 

Reflections of what used to be...

I think before I really start this journey I should give a little background on my life and since I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately I figure here is a good way to start.

  I was born in a tiny town of Houston, TX (maybe you have heard of it) to two awesome parents, who I must brag are still married to this day...these days that's a pretty big deal!  Soon after I was born we moved to the out skirts of Houston to a town the size of a dust particle called Splendora,  I'm nearly positive that the only way two people who are not from the Houston area find it is that they are driving up Hwy 59, run out of gas and decide to stay.  I will not lie and say that I didn't love my life there, it was the kinda place to grow up that everyone knew everyone and EVERYTHING if you were doing something wrong your mom knew about it in 2.5 minutes flat.  I learned a lot about life in this tiny town, I learned heart break, humility, friendships and how to fight.  I learned that teachers and coaches had eyes in the back of their heads and ears in every inch of the school,  if you cussed in the locker room  while telling a really good story your coach would find out and could make you run.   I learned that if there were 100 kids in the hall way and you flip a teacher off as they are walking away from you, that some adult would see your mistake and again a coach could make you run until either your legs fell off or you puked and there was nothing you could do about it.  I learned that if you are going to moon the school cameras (which at the time we thought our school was so high tech by having those) you shouldn't wear your letter man jacket that clearly shows you and your best friends name, apparently at 17 we didn't realize people could go back and watch those.  I learned that I was not the best driver, in 6 months I had totalled 2 cars, bumped into a car in the parking lot, and run out of gas more then my dad could count.  It was also then that I learned  when you call your dad and tell him that you are out of gas, its not as funny as your first thought, and even if you do still think it is funny, DO NOT under any circumstance continue to laugh.  I learned that if you are at a party that you really shouldn't be and it gets busted by the cops, NOT to raise your hand and ask the police if when he calls your house and your dad answers to please ask for your mom, because she would take the news better  then could break it to your dad.  I learned that I was not the pretty girl, but dang it I could make people laugh.  I learned that I would never be a super athlete nor would I ever be very graceful, I'm pretty sure I fell out of more chairs, tripped on more desk and gotten more injuries then anyone in the history of Splendora High School, who else is talented enough to give yourself whiplash going over a hurdle. I  learned that if you are going to do a practical joke like spray paint your name on road, its probably not smart to do in the exact spot your parents will drive the next morning...especially if you are the only Kayla and Shelley in the school.  I learned that if you sound exactly like your friend on the phone you can do all kinds of things, like break up with her boyfriends, or call her mom and ask her if she could do stuff (which was fun until she started yelling at who she thought was her daughter).  I learned the value of a dollar when I saved all my lunch money to buy a tanning membership (no wonder I was so skinny back then).  It took me a few years but I did learn that my parents were actually pretty cool! I learned that the love of my life would not be found when I was 17.  I learned never to say you would never marry a boy from your hometown.  I learned that no matter how hard I tried to get away and not come back that would always be my home.  I  learned I was never going to be the smartest nor would I have the most talent, but most importantly I learned that comical misfortunes would always follow me around.  I learned I'm goofy and that's just me, it's just my talent!

  Now that I have grown up some would say that I am plagued with a black cloud, I would disagree and say that I have learned God has just given me the gift of laughter, and maybe I can teach others how to use it!

Its official, Im a blogger...

Well this is something that has been a long time coming...I'm officially blogging!  I don't exactly know the content that will be in this blog but I do know that if it is interesting enough I will take all my blogs and create a book out of the material, and you guessed it the name will be Glitz Glam & Walmart (of course that will depend on them giving me permission to use the name, in which if they didn't I guess I would have to call it I had a catchy title but that didn't really work out) .  I will make no lies up front and say that I am good at grammar or spelling, so if these things bother you, STOP READING.  I figure if my dream for a book ever does come into fruition, that is what editors are for!  I have always had a dream to write a book, it was kinda one of those things that you never tell anyone about because you know that no one would believe you so I figured if I ever was going to do it now was as good a time as any and this was the best way to start.

  You don't have to read this, I want you to, but Im gonna pretend that I don't care if you hate it, and I'm gonna have fun doing it, just a warning I'm gonna be "that girl" and post everyone of  my new blogs on facebook and I'm sure I will have several friends that will not understand the point of this and will just give me heck about always being on the computer, but the way I see it, this is my life and I like it!  I can pretty much guess my family's reaction as soon as I share this with the world, I'm sure my brother will make fun of me, I'm sure my sister will be my main commenter, I'm sure my husband will be my silent partner that will slide in every now and again and just shake his head, I'm pretty sure my mom will give me some encouraging words and I'm pretty sure my dad doesn't know what a blog is, well maybe he does, if he does he will just read it and never make a statement on here then ask me about it later...

This is gonna be fun and I can't wait to let you all into a little piece of my life!